Wow, wow and wow. What an absolutely stunning place this is! Here’s our Evenley wood garden review
Ok so you do have to pay to the tune of £5 per adult and £1 per child but i had no regrets after this afternoon’s adventure. Best bit….zero dog shits were seen! Not even a bag dangling from a tree!!
The road to get there is bumpy as hell and the parking is on a huge field. But they have the rubber matting underneath to prevent the mud bath when the rain hits. We were the only people in the car park…..in fact I’m 90% sure we were the only people in the whole of the woods. Not even a single worker. Today’s entry was paid via an honesty box and yes before you ask I did pay. Make sure you do too if you decide to go to Evelnley wood garden. Which you 100% should!
If you’re expecting an adventure playground to entertain your kids while you sit on a bench sipping gin and having a fag while you catch up on the Goss with your best mate Mandy then read no further you will find bugger all like that here!
Make your own fun
This is 100% make your own, good, healthy, educational fun. Take your bug kits, take an autumn basket and collect treasures for craft later on, make a leaf crown if you’re that into craft (we aren’t) we did however take an autumn basket to fill with treasures. When I say autumn basket what i really mean is an empty bag from Chester zoo filled with leaves and feathers! Worked a treat though Elliot absolutely loved every second of it.
Its a large space filled with God knows how many different species of trees and plants. Luckily most of them are labelled. I actually thought I was well versed in plants and trees but this place had some plants and trees that left me stumped! (Pun intended).
There are stepping stones (actually logs but you get my drift) which Elliot loved jumping from one to the other, lots of little bridges over the stream (some are a bit fucked so be careful), wildlife (squirrels etc) we Probably would have seen more if Elliot hadn’t of insisted on bringing his bird whistle which sounds shit all like a bird, he blew that the whole way round! There are even shelters in case the weather turns or you need a rest.
Elliot loved the pond area throwing sticks and stones in. Part of it has been cornered off though due to very deep mud.
At this point I was pretty creeped out. I was fully aware that we were possibly the only 2 humans in the whole of Evenley wood garden. Then I started hearing creepy noises from the other side of the pond amongst the tree’s. Tried to get Elliot to be quiet so we could go into flight mode if needed…..zero chance! If someone did come after us we’d last all of 2 seconds Elliot still blowing away on that fucking whistle and every time I tried to take it off him he’d scream louder. Glad no one did come after us because I’d have probably left him behind. I fully believe that he’d annoy them so much they’d release him back into the wild!
We came across a really cool honey beehive. You can’t really see them from my crappy photography skills but you could see loads of them. You can’t get too close which is good because i reckon Elliot would have gone in head first otherwise!
There’s a lovely little cafe which unfortunately was shut (which I was aware of before going) I’d love to go back and try it out when it is open though it looked great! You’ll find toilets near to the main entrance too. Make sure you pick up a map when you pay I found this really useful!
Evenley wood garden stats
Distance from Bicester: 23 mins
Sat nav: Brackley NN13 5SL
Wheelchair friendly: very uneven ground in parts but not impossible
Equipment upkeep: 7/10 (few dodgy bridges)
Facilities: 9/10 If the cafe is open
Age range: All ages
Safety: depends on the child
Fun factor: 10/10
Dog friendly: Yes but must be kept on leads at all times.
I can imagine Evenley wood garden is magical throughout the whole year in each season. They have events on too so keep an eye out. This place would be perfect for a family photo shoot too so grab your phone’s and bribe your kids to pretend to like each other with sweets. I 100% recommend this place I just wish I’d have found it sooner. This place pisses all over stoke woods! Peaceful and clean. Perfect place to hide a body or just avoid people in general.
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